Saturday, December 08, 2007

How you know if someone is a jackass

Here are five ways you can tell someone is a jackass.

  • They only shovel the sidewalk up to their neighbor's property line.
  • They try to touch their front bumper to your back bumper while driving seventy five on the freeway.
  • When out for a walk, they move to the opposite sidewalk to avoid eye contact or worse, a conversation.
  • When you engage them in interpersonal conversation, they spend more time looking around than looking you in the eye.
  • They spend an hour telling you all about their kids, job, personal life, how much they made in the stock market, how their current job undervalues their "true" skills. And not once, ask you how you're doing.


Scooter said...

Seems like a very valid list, although I know someone at work who has an affliction where they can't really look you in the eye. I assume that doesn't count.

Mac Noland said...

You're correct Scooter. Those who have a social uncomfort with looking you in the eye during conversation are not included. They are not being rude, it's just an attribute of them.

The folks I'm talking about are the ones that are looking "around you" seeing who they can talk to next instead of being engaged in meaningful dialog. You know the ones.

David said...

This is hilarious.